Sunday, September 24, 2006

Martha



Martha

Martha is a marvelous homemaker,
The keeper of an always cozy house,
An extraordinary cookie baker,
An utterly impressive mom and spouse.

Martha’s made her home a sanctuary,
A formidable fortress of a farm
Where those of ill intentions dare not tarry.
She will not let her family come to harm.

Her son has grown to be a man of merit
Possessing skills she cannot understand.
Yet her compassion was his to inherit
When she tenderly took his tiny hands.

His origins, his blood give him his power,
But strength developed underneath her gaze.
Since that grim day of the meteor shower,
They've saved each other in so many ways.

Devoted to the husband who adores her
And to the son they've nurtured as their own,
She doesn't know what dangers lie in store for
The boy alien to his very bone.

But Martha's earned the name that she was given,
Exhibiting great faith and fortitude.
She's made her home a perfect one to live in
With comforts far beyond mere warmth and food.

She taught the teen whose hands have lifted boulders,
And she's the one he always will turn to
While carrying the town upon his shoulders,
For Martha is a Martha through and through.

Friday, September 22, 2006

I Came Here From Space (Looking for Space, John Denver)

John Denver's soul-searching anthem Looking for Space reminds me of Superman, so here's a parody circa the events of Superman Returns.

I Came Here From Space

I am growing experienced in trying to save the day,
Bringing truth, justice and this country's way.
I continue improving, driven by my goodwill,
Thwarting those who would seek to harm and kill.

Cuz I came here from space,
And they call me Superman.
Jor-El said that I'm part of a great plan.
Though it sometimes seems
That my life is unfair,
I'm bringing hope to the people
Each time I take to the air.

I have traveled the universe, hoping that I would see
Indications of what I'm meant to be.
Lost until I re-entered Earth's heavy atmosphere,
I heard its citizens crying out for me.

Cuz I came here from space,
And they call me Superman.
Jor-El said that I'm part of a great plan.
Though it sometimes seems
That my life is unfair,
I'm bringing hope to the people
Each time I take to the air.

I am growing experienced listening as they pray.
I hear them whisper, "He's back, and I hope he'll stay. I hope he'll stay.

Cuz he came here from space,
And I sure am glad he came,
Though I can't even say I know his name."
Though it oftentimes seems
That my life is unfair,
I'm bringing hope to the people
Each time I take to the air.
I'm bringing hope to the people,
To the people
When I'm flying high...

Thursday, September 7, 2006

Rocks That Are Green (Leaves That Are Green, Paul Simon)

Finally, here's something about Clark Kent from his perspective. This one goes way back to the first episode of Smallville and is to the tune of Leaves That Are Green.

Rocks That Are Green

I have felt like an outsider for so long,
And now it turns out that my hunch wasn't wrong.
I'm feeling down.
There are rocks that are green in this town,
And I'm flimsy as the wind
When I hold them in my hand.

Now my heart is filled with the love of a girl.
I can't get close, though, for at the very sight
Of her necklace I turn white.
There are rocks that are green in this town,
And I'm flimsy as the wind
When I hold them in my hand.

I'm shaken up because I took
The roof off Lex's car today.
Without me, he would have drowned.
There are rocks that are green in this town,
And I'm flimsy as the wind
When I hold them in my hand.

How far will these strange powers go?
I'd rather be a normal guy.
That's all I want.
There are rocks that are green in this town,
And I'm flimsy as the wind
When I hold them in my hand.


Monday, September 4, 2006

The Kids (The Kid, Buddy Mondlock)

I'm a big fan of A Series of Unfortunate Events, and I can't wait to see how Daniel Handler wraps up the series. Like Smallville, the series explores the sometimes tenuous line between heroism and villainy. Does the end always justify the means? And can one do bad things for a good reason without starting to do bad things for bad reasons? The Baudelaires are increasingly forced to do unscrupulous things in the name of self-preservation, and as unfortunate as it would be for the children to remain Count Olaf's captives indefinitely, it would be worse if they turned to villainy themselves... Anyway, here are some ruminations in the voice of Violet to the tune of The Kid.

The Kids

We're the kids whose guardians often work us
Far too hard. Our intelligence
Helps us sometimes, but Count Olaf has caught us,
And his crimes make us quake in fright.
Sunny bites. She is getting big now.
Time's flown so quickly since that fire.
Books that Klaus reads and inventions of mine
Bail us out when our need's dire.

We're the kids who almost fell out a window,
Staved off beasts and lobotomies,
Sawed through lumber and ran laps in a schoolyard.
We watched Count Olaf take our friends.
It's been months now, and we are so tired
Of all these trials and pitfalls.
Olaf's costumes are unconvincing.
Why can't the others see through them all?

We're the kids who thought our troubles were over
When we silenced those wedding bells.
Though we were talking, those adults just weren't listening,
So we have tales of woe to tell.
Mr. Poe is unfit for his station.
We are deeply disdainful.
We always try so hard to make him change his mind.
His obtuseness is painful.

We're the kids who have this habit of scheming,
And we hate what we have to do,
Cuz the truth is that the more we keep scheming,
The more we become villains too.



Daniel Desario (Daniel, Elton John / Bernie Taupin)

Here's a parody about one of my favorite TV shows, the sadly cancelled Freaks and Geeks. Though this thread was quickly dropped, in the first couple episodes Lindsay seems to have a pretty big crush on Daniel, who is nice to her but really isn't her type. This parody of Daniel is set midway through the second episode.

Daniel Desario

Daniel Desario's kind of a pain.
I don't want this bash tonight. I think it's sort of insane,
Oh, but how could I turn down those gorgeous eyes?
Oh, look out for Daniel, cuz he is one shifty guy.

Does he think I'm pretty? Perhaps it's a sin
To love a guy who is just as cavalier as James Dean,
Oh, but I just can't look at him enough.
Should I kiss Daniel? Want to kiss him so much...

Daniel Desario, you're older than me.
I think you have no shame, cuz you lie, cheat and steal.
Although I've tried to kiss this crush goodbye,
Daniel, I'm in love. I can't figure out why...

Daniel Desario's kind of a pain.
I don't want this bash tonight. I think it's sort of insane,
Oh, but how could I turn down those gorgeous eyes?
Oh, look out for Daniel, cuz he is one shifty guy.
Oh, yes, look out for Daniel, cuz he is one shifty guy.


Friday, September 1, 2006

He's a Villain (Rhymes and Reasons, John Denver)

Here's another parody about Lex Luthor, pertaining specifically to the episode Shattered in the third season and to the tune of Rhymes and Reasons.

He's a Villain

So you speak to me of madness,
And you claim my mind is splintered.
Fear is deep within you now
That I'm at my wit's end.

And it seems I must escape you
If you think that I've turned rotten,
But in truth, I really need you now.
Don't you know you're my best friend?

And that place Dad wants me going...
It's a crime! Yes, it is treason!
I'd go after him except
Then I fear I would begin
To be a cold, unfeeling villain
With an endless lust for power just like him.

He's a villain, and his power
Never made him a good father.
My life was filled with loneliness
Until that fateful day
I met you. I never doubted
He would always cause me pain, so
If you care about my future,
Don't let him put me away.

Well, I know my world would crumble
If my father's cronies found us.
It's hard to sit here waiting
When I know they're after me!

Oh, he thinks that he's so clever,
And he's sure he can deceive us,
But you've known right from the start
The sort of man he'll always be.
He has never been worth trusting;
Clark, I'm certain you can see

He's a villain. All his power
Never made him a good father.
My life was filled with loneliness
Until that fateful day
That you saved me. Now I'm clinging
To the hope that you believe me.
Please don't let him find us.
Save my life again today.