I've been meaning to versify about everybody's favorite boy wizard for quite some time, so here is my first Harry Potter parody, set to Suicide is Painless, which happens to be the theme song of my favorite sit-com, M*A*S*H. This song fits in somewhere between the end of the second book and the beginning of the third. More will follow, I'm sure...
The Ballad of Harry Potter
Well, when he was a youngster, Harry's
Room was underneath the stairs.
His uncle Vernon stashed him there,
Which Harry thought was quite unfair.
Now Harry Potter's famous.
His nemesis is nameless.
With Ronald and Hermione he'll get by.
When giant-hearted Hagrid came
And called the Potter boy by name,
Informing Harry of his fame,
His life would never be the same.
Now Harry Potter's famous.
His nemesis is nameless.
With Ronald and Hermione he'll get by.
He boarded the Hogwarts Express
And soon heard Dumbledore's address.
No longer plagued by loneliness,
He rescued Neville from distress.
Now Harry Potter's famous.
His nemesis is nameless.
With Ronald and Hermione he'll get by.
When stealthiness was called for, he
Embraced invisibility,
But Quidditch fans could clearly see
His skill as he was flying free.
Now Harry Potter's famous.
His nemesis is nameless.
With Ronald and Hermione he'll get by.
His taped-up glasses, lightning scar
And escapades in flying cars
Have helped him to become a star,
But he's not vain - at least so far.
Now Harry Potter's famous.
His nemesis is nameless.
With Ronald and Hermione he'll get by.
His pre-teen life's been torn apart
By Snape and Quirrell and Lockhart
And others skilled in the Dark Arts.
His greatest battle soon will start.
Now Harry Potter's famous.
His nemesis is nameless.
With Ronald and Hermione he'll get by.
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